Back on track

Okay so I'm back on track and officially 40 pounds lighter. I know I'm taking this slow, but I think that it is the only way to succeed.

A good start too 2008

I decided after more then 2 weeks to finally step on a scale. I haven't been to Jenny in like 3 maybe even 4 weeks now. However, I do have an appointment for this coming Sunday. Anyway, so I did it and I was in so much shock because I'm now down 38 pounds. I couldn't believe, that is almost 40 pounds and I'm hoping that's what it will be on Sunday. I'm going to keep my fingers crossed.

It been a while...

I know it's been a while since my last post. I've taken a break from Jenny for the holidays and I've managed to keep my 30 pound loss. I'll be getting back on track in the new year to start losing again.

A lot has happened since my last post. I bought a new car, that I pick up next week. It's a 2008 black Corolla Sport. I bought a new laptop, which I am on right now and I love it. I got my hair cut, it's short but not to short. Overall I'm just looking forward to New Years Eve and the new year in general.

In Memory of Josie Ferlito 1981-2007

Josie was a person that I had met in my previous department. She was a beautiful person and so full of life. Yesterday, Tues, Dec 4, 2007 she was involved in a tragic car accident were she succumbed to her injuries. She was 26 years old. She was always laughing and smiling and was the life of the party. Everyone who had the pleasure of meeting her loved here.

I'm stuggling to understand why...why she was the one who had to be taken from us at such a young age. I understand that people die and that it's the way of life, but I can't understand why her and why in the way she did? I can't stop thinking about her family, close friends and boyfriend. I'm mad that we kept push off getting together thinking we had all the time in the world. What I wouldn't do to see her and say goodbye.

21st weigh in

Well I neither gained nor lost weight this week. I've been really bad and I haven't really been following the plan. I think I'm bored with the food and I just don't have the drive and motivation right now. I've told myself that as of today I'm sticking to the plan and I'm not going to cheat. I hope I can do it, because I really want to lose next week.

20th weigh in

Boo...I gained a pound this week. It was totally my fault, I didn't eat properly at all. I'm okay with it though and I'm feeling great. I've been dating and just feeling really happy and pleased with myself. I'm really starting to notice the weight lose and feel it. I have a lot of energy and I'm not feeling tired at all. It's great :)

My life in the past 5 years.

So I was thinking to myself, “When did I become so serious?” I used to be carefree and a lot more go with the flow and I didn’t used to worry so much about my future. Now I have a career, I’m thinking about buying a place, marriage, and children and over all just settling down. So I said to myself, what’s happened, what’s changed in my life over the past 5 years and when I really started thinking about it, it started making a whole lot of sense. I guess it all started when I turned 21, my mother’s best friend, who is like a second mother to me was diagnosed with breast cancer, shortly after that I experienced my first close family deaths, I lost two of my grandmothers in the same week, followed by my mom going into acute kidney failure (for the second time), my uncle (my mom’s younger brother) who was 49 at the time, died from lung cancer, my mother went on dialysis and then just a little under a year later, had her second kidney transplant (which had not gone smoothly), I lost my job and suffered from some pretty major depression, my 20 year old cat had to be put down, I lost a grandfather and then another one a few months later. I got my heart broken; my brother’s father-in-law was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and died a year later, followed closely by my mom being diagnosed with skin cancer that had spread to her lymph nods. That brings us to present day where my last grandfather died a few weeks ago and my mom had major surgery a few days after that, which will be followed by radiation, which is still to come. In our family we are the type of people to not complain, take things as they come, deal with it and move on. But I guess it does take its toll and alters who you are. Looking at it all being written down it seems like a lot and may even seem over whelming for some and that is probably why I have become as serious as I’ve gotten older, but I know that it is just life and I have to deal with it or it will control me.